Build your Forgiveness Muscle

Last Friday I had the priviledge to lead my Cell Group in Bible study. The subject was on "Build your Forgiveness Muscle". I did some research and was delighted to deliver this piece which I shall share with you as follows.

Recap: Tonight we are doing the 4th lesson in the series. In the first 3 lessons we touched on 3 types of choices, important choices that confront us in our daily living, choices that could make or break us.

Yes, choices that if you made them correctly will change your life. We have discovered:

1. A new perspective on Interruptions and how to use them “Interruptions as God-appointments,” specifically as opportunities for us to be used by God to minister healing to those around us who are hurting.

2. That “Obedience over Control” isn’t a weakness and there are intangible benefits of doing things God’s way. Think of the many times we obeyed God and the blessings that came.

3. Last week, we learned what “real compassion” is (it is not just an emotion (sympathy) but goes further, it’s an action), and if we pursue it over convenience, the blessings that will be released can be beyond our imagination!

Tonight, we continue in the series “Choices That Will Change Your Life” and the choice before us in essence to me is “The Divine Command to forgive, are we obeying it? Are we building up our forgiveness muscle”?

A big topic to cover; appears awesome at first sight but when you get down to it (with faith) it is not that awesome as it first appeared. To break the ice and set your minds thinking, I will start by giving this short introduction.

We have heard of an IQ, an EQ. Some people have a high IQ but low EQ. Others, high on EQ moderate on IQ. Some, low in both. Where you stand I shall leave that to you.

Now I wonder if you’re tested on a Forgiveness Quotient (FQ) how would you score. Think about it.

Yes, tonight we shall look at the importance of forgiveness and on how to build our forgiveness muscle, modeling after Jesus. No doubt, modeling after Jesus is not going to be easy but is there another way?

Testimonies of godly men and women past and present have shown that when we make decisions based on Christ's example and biblical principles, instead of on mere emotions and off the cuff, we build confidence, hope, and courage.

We are empowered to take positive, life-changing action, then what happens? Our lives are transformed in a way we never thought possible. We become a better person. Isn’t that wonderful? Hallelujah!

Before going into the depth of tonight’s lesson, anyone of you want to define what “forgiveness” is? What does it mean to you? Why is it so difficult to forgive?

First, let me tell you what forgiveness is not, i.e. what lies on the opposite side. On the opposite side of forgiveness lie resentment, jealousy, hatred, anger and revenge. Correct me if I am wrong, these feelings of remorse/ unforgiving which are pent up inside of us (if not released) are waiting for a right time to explode!

Question I want to ask is, “Is there any gain by harboring unforgiveness or having an unforgiving heart?” Who suffers the perpetrator or the victim? I ask you, isn’t there a better way to live than this?

Somebody once said, “Being angry at somebody is like throwing hot coals on the other persons with your bare hands”. It hurts both, the thrower actually gets the brunt of the burns (imagine hot coals on bare hands!)

When it hurts inside and you are unforgiving, my advice to you is simply this. Take a step back and ask yourself 2 pertinent questions.

1. “What good or hope has hatred, jealousy, anger and resentment ever brought?
2. “What problems have ever been resolved by revenge or unforgiveness?”

Can’t think of anything good, can you? On the other hand, the good that’s released from forgiveness can be incredible! Think about it, but don’t rush.

The Oxford English Dictionary defines forgiveness as “to grant free pardon and to give up all claim on account of an offense or debt.”

But I like this definition from Wikipedia which says:
“Forgiveness is the process of ceasing to feel resentment, indignation or anger against another person for a perceived offense, difference or mistake, or ceasing to demand punishment or restitution.”

The story given in our Study Guide is a one about gossip, a story about character-assassination, exaggeration and bad-mouthing maybe even slander of people you know, resulting in a lot of unpleasantness, unnecessary hurt and anger all over where sometimes the perpetrator don’t even know. Of course “talk is cheap” but who will suffer?

Try never to hold a grudge for too long, why? I think it will eat your heart out that’s why!

We can release all those pent-up feelings of ill-will (they do us no good) by seeking God in prayer. And I think God will say, yes in one word, forgive. How do we do it? Here are 4 simple steps:

1. Acknowledge and go through your pain (i.e. first tell the true story of exactly what happened, grieve over it fully if you must), then
2. Get rid of your resentment. Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for your enemy to die.
3. Reach out to the offender with love and compassion.
4. And forgive. (Just let go whatever hurts that’s left with God’s help)

I tell you, you will emerge a better person.

Now, let me relate to you a real story about the beauty and grandeur of forgiveness.

It is a story about Nelson Mandela, one who needs no introduction.

We all know that he fought against the racist system of apartheid in South Africa and was imprisoned for 20+ years. When he got out, he harbored no ill will and became South Africa's president in 1994. He did not emerge from prison a bitter person. He forgave those who imprisoned him and pursued peace. In fact, his attitude of forgiveness helped South African transition from a rule by whites only to a true democratic system. Afterwards, the Truth and Reconciliation Committee was set up to uncover the facts of South African apartheid and to forgive those involved. Desmond Tutu, who presided over the commission, wrote a book about it called “No Future without Forgiveness”, which is worth reading if you're interested.

I want to tell you another one (a true story of forgiveness about one Sue Norton) but I am afraid that time does not permit. Check that out from Google if you want.

You see my friends; to be able to forgive is not a weakness. In fact it takes a strong person to say sorry, and an even stronger person to forgive.

Mahatma Gandhi said this, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” And Mahatma Gandhi wasn’t weak at all when he advocated a principle of non-violence to achieve political and social reforms (the fight “right against might” in a peaceful manner). Remember his famous quote, "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind." To him all violence was evil and could not be justified. Using non-violence to pursue reforms required incredible faith, courage, and forgiveness. He rose to become the founding father of a nation, a great leader, in fact the greatest that India ever had!

You’ve probably heard the saying, “To err is human, and to forgive is Divine.”

Of all of the human qualities that make men in any sense like God (Christ-like), none is more divine than forgiveness. Indeed, you are never more like God than when you forgive for to forgive is divine, a God attribute and not man’s. That’s why it’s so difficult for man to forgive. We must ask God to give us this divine gift to forgive, everyday.

Haven you noticed that our God is not only a God of love; He is also a God of forgiveness. The God of so-much more, that’s our God. Amen?

Modeling Jesus let me quickly run thru’ the best known teachings and practices of forgiveness as given in the Bible.

The Parable of the Prodigal Son is perhaps the best known instance of such teaching and practice of forgiveness. The character of God's forgiveness is seen here as eager, lavish, loving forgiveness, and not holding anything back. That’s the kind of forgiveness we are asked to emulate.

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus repeatedly spoke of forgiveness, “Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.” Matthew 5:7

“But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also.” Luke 6:27-29

“And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” (Mark 11:25)

“For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” (Matthew 6:14-15)

Do all these teachings from our Lord Jesus mean anything to you? For more let’s read from the Bible, Matthew 18:21-35. There will be questions later.

In Matthew 18: 21-22, "Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times (or seventy times seven).”

Known as The parable of the Unmerciful Servant, it concludes: “In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.” (Matthew 18:34-35) The severity of chastening for one who doesn't forgive is clearly demonstrated. (See also Matthew 6:14-15). What do you make of it?

The message is reiterated in Ephesians:
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)

Conclusion:
We must all learn to forgive for forgiveness is a good thing. It warms the heart and cools the sting, doesn’t it?

Research has shown that forgiving actually lowers blood pressure. It reduces the strain on your heart. It certainly reduces depression, anger and stress as well as makes people feel more hopeful and happy.

In short forgiveness is good for the body, mind and spirit. Not only that but when we have a forgiving heart, one that’s abounding in loving kindness, it fulfills the Divine Command to forgive. (Note to forgive is paramount in the Lord’s Prayer).

Someone once said, “There are two kinds of errors that we make: errors of commission and errors of omission. It is said that the latter ones bother us more in life.” Looking back at our lives, how many times have you (or have I) failed to forgive when forgiveness is due?

For without forgiveness, life is governed by an endless cycle of hurts, resentment and retaliation. These are the chains that bind us; we must break free from these chains and learn to live as God would want us live.

So, in conclusion let me say this to you: Face-up and have the courage to forgive; let go, build up your forgiveness muscle, then you can live a life that’s truly abundant and free! And in all these actions I pray, may God be with you.

Thomas Watson wrote many years ago a very interesting statement. He said this, “We need not climb up into heaven to see whether our sins are forgiven. Let us look into our hearts and see if we can forgive others. If we can, we need not doubt that God has forgiven us.”

Let’s pray together.

To be Minimalist or not (Is Less Really More?)

Confucius said, “Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” The question is, can we help it?

Does a minimalist lifestyle appeal to me? How far am I prepared to take it? If you wanted a reply, my reply to you would be this.

As for me, it's a yes to "moderate living" but "minimalist" I'll have to say no to that. I think that minimalist existence is too simplistic a living as many affordables if not all luxuries have to be excluded, right?

Decluttering and the untangling of one's living after a lifetime of building wealth or asset creation up to a point is good but when one's living becomes too minimalist, then I think those actions (the decluttering and the untangling) can't be helpful. It might lead to "dismantling" (of whatever we have built) if you can see what I mean.

Of course there will be the joys and benefits of clutter-free living, but just how clutter-free can one get before a host of new problems (mostly consequential) make their appearance?

Joshua Becker in his e-book “Simplify: 7 Guiding Principles to Help Anyone Declutter Their Home and Life” has redefined minimalism as “the intentional promotion of the things you most value and the removal of anything that distracts you from it.” He says it's less about removing possessions just to remove possessions, and more about finding a lifestyle of simplicity that works for you and your family.

If those were the principles of minimalism, then I am all for it. But I think a minimalist lifestyle doesn't just mean simplifying your life. There's more to it. The underlying object is to live simply where possible with less and less of materialism. But the stark reality today is how to live well with less and less (of anything for that matter)?

I am sure you have heard the song with the catchy tune entitled "The Bare Necessities" sung by Phil Harris as Baloo and Bruce Reitherman as Mowgli in the Disney film "The Jungle Book" which extols the joys of clutter-free living but let's face it, I think in today's world, that's only good for the "birds, the bears and the bees".

Nonetheless the e-book entitled "The Art of being Minimalist" written by one Everett Bogue is worth exploring.

The author gave this testimony: "In July of 2009 I quit my job and moved from New York to Portland Oregon with everything I owned in a backpack. I had no plan and $3000 in the bank. Everyone told me I'd starve, but I didn't. Instead I adopted an minimalist lifestyle. I cooked all of my own food, I started working exclusively on the Internet. I learned to manage my time and empty my email inbox. It's about the freedom that comes from leaving everything and embarking on an experience that actually means something. I wrote The Art of Being Minimalist to help people declutter their lives, untangle their schedules, and find the freedom they've always dreamed they could have. My goal is to help people opt out of the perpetual motion machine of corporate consumer culture, begin creating, and find their own personal liberation."

The Western model is always about personal liberation and finding the freedom to do as one pleases. One way to achieve that is to lead a minimalist lifestyle where we are told we could free ourselves presumably from "the mess" of life.

Indeed where living is concerned, there is appeal in declutter, untangle, find freedom, all of which are ingredients for a minimalist existence.

A practitioner of minimalism (lifestyle) is one being or providing a bare minimum of what is necessary in living which in essence I think is an extremely conservative approach in lifestyle. The other extreme (opposite of minimalist) is a baroque, flamboyant, extravagant, or what one might say an excessive, (Gramarye) lifestyle?

I believe there is a moderate, happy existence in between where we don't have to live with everything on the one hand or nothing on the other. I advocate this stand but what is your call?

There is of course a Christian perspective to all this, one which I think that we (as Christians) should know better but that story is for another day.

For now, suffice just to remember these words from the Bible: “Godliness with contentment is great gain”. I’ll bet on that. How about you?

Reflections of a passing year

A creative guy (didn't get his name) put up this tag which I find quite interesting. It's has a short message with a sexy little twist! I hope he wouldn't mind me showing it off to you guys.

Incredible, but that's the INTERNET WORLD we now live in! First we have the WEB (www) then came WINDOWS, YAHOO, YOUTUBE, GOOGLE, FACEBOOK, TWITTER and SKYPE to name a few. Does an APPLE or a BLACKBERRY mean anything to you? Following that we have the i's and the e's as in iPOD, iPAD, iTUNES, iROBOT, eBAY, eTHIS or eTHAT.

You might ask what's in a name anyway? Privately between you and I they don't mean much but in the business world, these simple names command millions if not billions (of $). Ask anyone.

They have become household names and in a short span of time made their inventors or creators extremely wealthy. I am not jealous but what they did can make a mockery of one's lifetime of hardwork as an employee if you can see what I mean! The world /market place certainly isn't fair, is it?

Whether you like it or not, Cyberspace wherever that is, billions of people around the world are using or flocking to it. For study, work, blog or play and socializing (networking); even shopping and personal banking are possible at the tap of a mouse, without leaving home! It has become a convenience that many of us cannot live without. But is it safe? Everytime I get on to the Borderless SUPER-HIGHWAY, I get an eerie feeling that I am being watched. How about you?

Now, did you know that the 1st web page came into being on Christmas day exactly 20 years ago today? It was Sir Tim Berners-Lee (British), then a scientist at CERN, the European Organisation for Nuclear Research, who is credited as the man who invented the world wide web.

Sir Tim's work led to the creation of HTML - Hypertext Markup Language - a coding language used to describe how to present text and images in an electronic format. When combined with a URL (Uniform Resource Locator) and HTTP (Hypertext Transfer Protocol), a framework was built that would enableusers to access electronic documents in a standard way.

The web has revolutionised the way we live, work and communicate. And now the internet is on the brink of a second transformation, as technology experts search for new ways to make the web more "intelligent". The famed American architect Frank Llyod Wright noted, "If it keeps up, man will atrophy all his limbs but the push button finger". There is a real danger indeed that this could happen.

Can you imagine what the future holds for all of us if the current trend continues? I dread to think but in time humanity could literally loose not only its limbs but its face also. Is God going to be forgotten with all this technology, I wonder?

I beg to ask but is humanity better off today than before the WEB came into being? Didn't Albert Einstein (no introduction needed) warned us and said not very long ago, "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity." Isn't that true today?

Let me ask you: Is humanity acquiring all the right technology but for all the wrong reasons? Guess what? But can you imagine what life could be like if man did not invent the INTERNET? Think on it as a reflection of a passing year.

Seasons Greetings and Best Wishes to you all.

Yours truly,
DC

Changing times

There has been so much news circulating about politics of late, aren't you tired of it? Read something different, something that I've cooked up especially for you like this one which follows below. Hope you'll find it refreshing, informative, and stimulating as you wish it to be.

Times have changed and indeed it has. If you don't believe me, try calling 999 for help and you'll see what I mean. Sad but I think what this fella said is true which is this and I quote, "We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police!" Indeed that's an often overlooked fact of life, incredible you might say but who's kidding?

You might not recall but another guy had once said, "As far as I'm concerned, progress peaked with frozen pizza." On hindsight, we now know how wrong he was! Like what Bill Gates said in his infamous quotation about computing not very long ago which was this: "640K ought to be enough for anybody." That fooled many of us at that time, didn't it?

Modern technology is literally driving the pace of living at break-neck speed and this is frightening! For instance, I dread to think what the latest stem-cell research could be taking us to. And even in this generation, mechanical robots not only can walk and talk, they are beginning to be able to think like humans too!

But closer to home and to things that matter in family life, we have probably heard that "single motherhood" is also on the rise nowadays. Talk of changing times, I sense that the modern woman is no longer quite the same as her role-model mother of the yesteryears! I ask you what's wrong with our young, the well-educated yet unmarried women folks of today? They don't want to get married!

For instance, when her instinct or biological drive to reproduce heightens what does she do if she can't find Mr Right? Thanks to "science", I am told she can at least find Mr Perfect Sperm Donor and have the baby she's always wanted, quickly, efficiently and without a man in her life. It's amazing but that is exactly what is already happening in the West and soon expected to arrive at our shores.

Would you believe it but there's nothing to be ashamed about being invited to an "insemination party", where "getting labelled", "exchanging bio-datas", "reviewing semen specimens", and callously "matching orders" are the agendas of the night. The likes of such new forms of extrovert social behaviour which were never heard of before would be considered extremely outrageous in our culture but are catching on with our "liberated" women of today.

She goes about finding the right sperm-donor in a so-called "insemination party"... OMG no marriage as we know it or tie-ups are necessary! Mr Right gets a modern makeover literally! But believe that or not, I put it to you.

Now, it's becoming real at least in America, what defines a modern day American family is no longer this: "A traditional mother, father, two children and a dog named Spot" and that the new norm of "single parenthood" can be just as fulfilling if not more so than married couples are in life today. However, I wouldn't bet on that!

True to Hollywood style, all those "astounding stuff" which I mentioned above have been made the subject of a latest comedy movie just released in the USA subtly called "The Switch" where "single parenthood" is put to the test. Catch it, as it too is coming to our big screen soon.

If you want a preview, click here. It makes an interesting read, a preview pehaps of things to come; a future made for youths, one that's unfazed but quite scary. I don't know about us the "elder generation", what's our response? A totally new and disturbing future beckons, but are we ready? Think on it.

Meantime enjoy this beautiful song from Celine Dion sung in French meaning "Let's talk about love" or "S'il Suffisait D'aimer". Thanks to "CelineDionBRA" for sharing.

What women say about men

Women have played important roles throughout history. They have been responsible for the rise and fall of nations, sustaining families, and have been the focal point of worship in many religions.

I think it’s not wrong to say that the women of today never had it so good; I mean of course, society’s treatment of our women.

In the earliest of times women were mere slaves to men. But with the dawn of the Modern Age, the treatment of women has improved dramatically. Today, women are near equals to men in almost all fields.

I think it is not wrong to say that at coffee shop gatherings men talk a lot about women and vice versa, the same could be said about women on men.

But does each side know what the other side is saying?

On this occasion, it might be interesting to hear what women have been saying or have said about us, men.

Here are some interesting examples.

These quotes are actually quite harmless though they might raise some eyebrows or set your heart and mind abuzz!

Nonetheless true or not, you decide. Read on...

“God made man stronger but not necessarily more intelligent. He gave women intuition and femininity. And, used properly, that combination easily jumbles the brain of any man I've ever met.” ~Farrah Fawcett

“The male chromosome is an incomplete female chromosome. In other words the male is a walking abortion; aborted at the gene stage. To be male is to be deficient, emotionally limited; maleness is a deficiency disease and males are emotional cripples.”~Valerie Solanos

“Men are generally more law-abiding than women. Women have the feeling that since they didn't make the rules, the rules have nothing to do with them.”
~Diane Johnson

“The trouble about man is twofold. He cannot learn truths which are too complicated; he forgets truths which are too simple.”
~Rebecca West

“Men are like a deck of cards. You'll find the occasional king, but most are jacks.” ~Laura Swenson

“If you want anything said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman.” ~Margaret Thatcher

“Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.”
~ Charlotte Whitton

“Behind every great man, there is a surprised woman.”~Maryon Pearson

“The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things.” ~Jilly Cooper

“A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.”
~Mae West

The old theory was "Marry an older man, because they're more mature." But the new theory is: "Men don't mature. Marry a younger one."
~Rita Rudner

“A gentleman is simply a patient wolf.”~Lana Turner

“Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself - like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.” ~Jean Kerr

“They say women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men.”
~Clare Booth Luce

“If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?”
~Linda Ellerbee

“When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.”
~Elayne Boosler

“Men can read maps better than women. 'Cause only the male mind could conceive of one inch equaling a hundred miles.”
~Roseanne Barr

“Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.”
~Mae West

“Men are like a fine wine. They start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with.” ~Author Unknown

“Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.”
~Katharine Hepburn

“To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.”
~Helen Rowland

“Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.”
~Jean Kerr

“Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?”
~Virginia Woolf

“The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.” ~Author Unknown

“Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women.” ~Nicole Hollander

"An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have: the older she gets, the more interested he is in her."
~Agatha Christie

“A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job.”
~Ella Harris

“Whether women are better than men I cannot say—but I can say they are certainly no worse.”
~Golda Meir

Wow women, I wonder what we men would do without her!

Cheers!

Let's listen to Elvis Presley sing "Take good care of her". Thanks to "Jackiej61too" for bringing to us this beautiful music-video. Enjoy.

Tips on happiness

Do you know what makes you happy?

Well, that’s not an easy question to answer. Neither is this one: Is happiness closer than you think?

To some, maybe it’s a loving family, spending time with friends, or a walk in the park; to others maybe its money, position and power, and all the materialistic things that this world can offer.

Of course if you know the secret to happiness that’s a real advantage. You’ll be one of the luckiest person alive if you know what I mean.

There is really no magical formula to be happy and because we are all made differently I think one size doesn’t fit all. Surprisingly on this issue, there are social scientists who beg to differ. See this rather interesting BBC report.

Anyway here are some tips on happiness which I believe everyone can take up, either to do or to be. Worth trying if you’re not already there.

1. Live simply.

2. Don’t carry debts.

3. Be content and don’t envy others.

4. Connect with God (i.e. make peace with God).

5. Connect with Nature too (e.g. have your regular walks in the park, see and take time to appreciate the flowers, the birds and the trees; travel, go to places you’ve never been before).

6. Smile often and laugh much.

7. Accept change.

8. Be positive and self reliant.

9. Cultivate a passion, a hobby. Be part of something bigger than yourself.

10. Help needy people; volunteer your service in charitable works.

11. Give more and expect less.

12. Read a good book and listen to your favorite music often.

Indeed a good book stimulates and enriches the mind and music soothes the soul. And we all need these often to live life happy, don’t we?

The above are just a few, there are probably many more than I care to list. But it is enough; all you need to do is to make the effort to cultivate at least some of the above, the more the better and I am quite sure the happiness in your life will increase.

However, don’t worry even if you don’t get there. None of us can be happy all the time. God made us this way so that we’d know whom we might to turn to when we’re down in the doldrums.

There is a Jewish Proverb that says, "God is closest to those with broken hearts." Yes hearts, those that are most broken and contrite. Seek him and be surprised by what you’ll find.

We all know there are no guarantees in life. So my advice is this, “Do the best you can and trust in Almighty God to do the rest,” believing always in this that it’s going to be alright when God is on our side.

There is a season and a reason for everything. When things don’t go right, just ask your good-selves in the end will it all matter?

Someone did say, “You only live once, but if you work it right, once is enough!”

Cheers!

Here's a beautiful song for you. It's entitled "It's a Miracle" sung by Debbie Reynolds in the 1966 oscar-winning movie, "The Singing Nun". Thanks to "Camiletc" for sharing. Enjoy.

Reba McEntire revisited

I am a fan of Reba McEntire, the great reigning Queen of Country Music. Her voice is just fantastic. I wrote about her in my blog of 30 September 2009 which you can back-track and go read.

Thanks to “kingmojopin0” here’s another number from that great artiste. If you like good old country music, I am sure you’ll like this rendition entitled “You Lie”.

Follow the lyrics given below. You might just fall in love with Reba’s beautiful great voice like I did. Cheers!



Lyrics:
We lie in the dark I know you're awake
The only sounds are the sounds this old house makes
Oh, how I long, I long to hear your voice
Desperate to talk, yearning to touch
Burning inside 'cause I want you so much
So I say I need you and leave you no choice

You lie, you don't want to hurt me
So you lie, buy a little time, and I go along
What else can I do, maybe it's wrong
But you know how much I love you
So you lie, 'til you can find a way to say goodbye
You lie

How long until you just can't go on
And the urge to break loose is just too strong
You should let go that's what you want to do
Oh but you don't know, you don't know
If it's the right thing to do

So you lie, you don't want to hurt me
So you lie, buy a little time, and I go along
What else can I do, maybe it's wrong
But you know how much I love you
So you lie, 'til you can find a way to say goodbye
Oh, You lie
You lie
Oh, You lie...

On blogging

Blogging or writing a “blog” on the Net is fun but it can be stressful too.

When you open up your “blog” and you have nothing to write or say the fun can suddenly stop short.

It’s quite a common experience, an affliction which is known as “writers’ block”. Once afflicted you can’t write. It smacks at you literally in the face and it won’t go away.

What do you do? What else could you do but to take five? Do a walkabout even if it’s around the house or go read a book or something.

If the thoughts do come back in a flash, the key is to jolt them down quickly before they disappear.

One or two key words at a time or a phrase in broken English perhaps but that don’t matter as you can always edit and/or modify them later.

You’ll be surprised how quickly words become lines and lines become paragraphs and the story slowly unfolds before your very eyes.

It’s really fun to capture your thoughts and to write them down.

I totally agree with what one William Makepeace Thackeray had said and it is this, “There are thousands of thoughts lying within a man that he does not know till he takes up the pen and writes”.

What I like best about blogging (or any form of writing for that matter) is expounded by Norbet Platt. This is what he had said, “The act of putting pen to paper encourages pause for thought, this in turn makes us think more deeply about life, which helps us regain our equilibrium.”

On another occasion someone had this to say, “The wastebasket is a writer's best friend.” Unfortunately, this may be true for many a budding writer or would-be blogger. The hand is willing but too often the mind is weak.

You try and try but somehow you just couldn’t get the hank of it but for heaven’s sake don’t give up!

Come to think about it, it’s not just on blogging. I would say the stress of “a thousand attempts” also goes for almost anything in life that has value or of significance that’s worth pursuing, isn’t it?

They say whatever is worth doing is worth doing it well and you really can’t deny the truth of the often quoted saying, “no pain, no gain”, can you?

On writing, Enrique Jardiel Poncela had put it this way, “When something can be read without effort, great effort has gone into its writing.”

And I’ll say it again echoing the words of Nathaniel Hawthorne which are these, “Easy reading is damn hard writing.”

I know because I have gone down that road but I tell you fellows that keeping this blog alive and interesting has been an exhilarating experience both to my body, soul and spirit.

Somehow you’ll feel good when you see your piece (of writing) finally in print and is posted for the world to see. Try it yourselves some day and you’ll see what I mean.

I think a regular exercise of the brain cells isn’t going to hurt anyone. In fact the “stress” which if I may call it, is good for everyone young or old.

Thank you for visiting my blog. I hope I’ll see you back soon. You light up my life!

Cheers!

Here's a lovely song for you entitled "Let's keep it that way" by Anne Murray. It's one of my favorites. Thanks to "elitewowmacho69" for sharing. Enjoy.

On feeling grumpy

Hi folks, can feeling grumpy be good for you? Yes it can says a BBC report.

Believe it or not but in every negative there can be some good, even if that negative is "feeling grumpy".

You can actually think better in a bad mood than in a good one. I don't know about you, but that beats me!

Quote from a BBC report.

"An Australian psychology expert who has been studying emotions has found being grumpy makes us think more clearly. In contrast to those annoying happy types, miserable people are better at decision-making and less gullible, his experiments showed."

Unquote.

If you want to read more of this rather extraordinary article, click here.

So the next time you're down in a bad mood, don't worry you can actually articulate better in such a situation than when you're not!

Cheers!

On friendship

When we were young we had many friends, in fact too many to count but as we grow older and moved on in life I find that the number of our friends has actually shrunk, dwindled to be exact. Wonder why?

And for those who have retired the number of friends you have is probably less than a handful.

The irony seems to me is that when you were busy crafting out a career, friends of all kinds flock to you like bees to flowers in bloom but now when you have plenty of time on your hands (in retirement), how come you have so few friends to spare?

I guess when we retire we retreat from the social circle of life. For many of us, we shied away from the public life that we once had.

We spend our days with family more than anything else and I would say like it or not, the time may have come when our spouse has actually become our best friend.

Henry Brooks Adams said this a long time ago and it’s probably still true even today, “One friend in a lifetime is much, two are many, and three are hardly possible. Friendship needs a certain parallelism of life, a community of thought, and a rivalry of aim.”

If I might say most of our friends are superficial; they all put on a mask of some sort and often are not there for you when you needed them most. I dare say that there are a few who will even take advantage of you if you are “not looking”. So be warned.

Now I can see why Charles de Gaulle, the great French general (who later on became President of France) had this to say about men and friendship, “The better I know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.” How pathetic?

But as we grow older we actually need friends more than anything else. Honest and sincere friends to spend time with, to roam together and to talk about almost anything under the sun. Indeed friends that we will not be bored with one another even until the cows come home. Is that too much to ask?

The famous modern day English philosopher C S Lewis had this to say, “Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.” I wonder what he really meant.

Can we survive without it (i.e. friendship)? Of course we can if we must but I like what Lois Wyse had advised which is this, “A good friend is a connection to life, a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world.”

Question is this, how do you find a good friend if you have not found one already in your senior years?

Well, an easier way out is that there’s no need to go about finding it, just be one and you could be surprised by what you’ll get.

To tell you the truth probably no man ever had a friend that he did not dislike a little. It’s a fact of life.

But that doesn’t mean friendship has no meaning or value.

Now, let me ask you this, if you were to sum up friendship in one word, what would that be? Think on it.

To all my friends out there I have this to say, thank you for being my friend. You’re simply the best!

Here's a lovely song entitled "The Friendship Song" or more aptly put "Friends are quiet angels" sung by Molly Pasutti, the music-video courtesy of "Musiconcepts". TQ for sharing. Enjoy.